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Thursday, January 15, 2009

Not Naughty

So here are the latest Aiden phrases & stories:

Aiden woke up this morning and immediately informed me his blanket had caught on fire. ("Mama, blanket fire.") What is this child dreaming about?!!

Actually, the blanket on fire comment was a nice change from the usual string of phrases. Nearly every morning when Aiden wakes up he tells me that fire is hot, scissors cut and chemicals spray. This is his run-down to let me know he remembers and understands all the dangerous things I have taught him about. Perhaps every morning he's telling me that he knows they're dangerous and would like me to butt out so he can play with them and not be uniterrupted today.

He told me yesterday, when I was putting on his shoes to go to the park, that his shoes were crazy. ("Shoes crazy.")

If he moves something heavy, climbs down or does anything dangerous he now tells himself "Careful" before I can. If I hear him say careful from the other room, I usually come running. Today he caught the fridge door before it closed and said "More- careful! Heavy!" as he grunted and carried a 2-liter of Sprite across the kitchen to me. He let out a sigh of relief when I took the nearly-full bottle from him and then said in a very polite tone, to correct his earlier statement, "Mama, more Sprite".

He's resorted to shouting at the top of his lungs "BAHDAHGGEHOWWWT!" (bad dog, get out) whenever Major is in his way. Ironically, it's in the same pitch and tone that I use to shout at Major when he's underfoot in the kitchen. Wonder where he got it....LOL!

When he got bored with eating his breakfast this morning he sat in his high chair and made a little whimper sound and then said "Whine". I told him he was right, that was whining. He made a new whining sound and again said "whine". "Mmm, hmm. That's right Aiden." This was followed by a third, SUPER OBNOXIOUS whining sound that I usually don't hear until it's melt-down time around 5:30 in the evening. I glanced over my shoulder from flipping pancakes and asked him why he was whining. He beamed and said "WHINE!" as if he'd finally figured out exactly what noise I am referring to when I say "No whining, tell me in words." ROFL!

Also new is his tendency to check in with me about his behavior throughout the day by saying "Not naughty" as he does various random things. This has gotten us a couple laughs in public already. It is nice when he pauses to ask "not naughty?" before he pulls out the trash but it's downright hysterical when he asks before he eats his peaches, picks up his Mac truck or takes a drink of his sippy cup. Yesterday he informed me the park was 'not naughty'. Tonight when he asked before climbing on the kitchen table, Brian told him that was naughty. His eyes zoomed to my (forced) serious face and I told him his dad was right. He looked quite sad and immediately climbed down. I made sure he got hugs and attention from us both and wondered if he's asking if we're MAD at him, as opposed to him truly understanding the meaning of naughty. I'll have to watch that - knowing he's unconditionally loved by us is much, much more important than behavior. Besides, if he didn't misbehave I'd have nothing to talk about on my blog!

We've been to the park a lot this week. Yesterday we stopped by one he hasn't been to since he was 9 months. It has a echo tube system where you can talk into the cone end of a metal pipe that goes under the ground and someone on the other side of the playground can hear you through the cone pipe on the other end. Aiden walked cautiously up to one quiet end of the pipe, froze and then told me in a very concerned tone that it was a shower. (He doesn't like showers because he's accidentally turned ours on while he was in the tub and got hosed.) His next fifteen worried references to the 'shower' never failed to elicit giggles from the other parents.

Today after a diaper change Aiden demanded a wet wipe. He proceeded to tell his blanket it was "messy" and then wiped it down with the wet wipe. Later he told blanket it was "not naughty", probably to soothe any hurt feelings he caused after calling it messy.

While I was busy cooking dinner tonight Major started to walk into the kitchen and I gave a quiet command to send him right back out. When he retreated to go stand with Aiden by the table I heard Aiden tell him "Good dog not naughty".

My sister Sheena had baby Kyler by C-section on Monday and she e-mailed us a picture that afternoon. Aiden looooooves babies so I showed him his new cousin and explained it was Aunt Sheena & Uncle Tyler's baby. He very excitedly shouted "BABY! Uncle Sheena baby! Baby Ky-yur!"

Two weeks ago I was cleaning out my jewelry drawer when Aiden found a brown zippered jewelry case with a mirror inside the lid that caught his interest. While he was playing with it an idea hit me and I quickly filled it with some costume jewelry and told him it was pirate treasure. Now he goes to my drawer and asks to play with the "Pirah Trahsur" almost every single day!

I am in the habit of labeling every object that I can think of for Aiden, which is why he knows what some random things - like whisks and chemicals - are called. Today he was watching me put on my makeup and was labeling the products for me. I realized he knows the names of more makeup items than Brian, who still gets eye shadow, eye liner and mascara confused. However, Aiden insists it is all yucky and will throw my entire makeup bag in the trash the moment I turn my back!

On Sunday I scolded Brian for not letting Aiden play with his Transformer and he retorted that I don't let Aiden play with my craft supplies so I can't complain. Yesterday I gave Aiden two flower embellishments to play with. This morning I found them both clean, uncrumpled and sitting neatly on the floor in front of my craft closet doors, as if to say 'These are hideous. You can have them back. I'll trade you for a Transformer.'

You'll hear Aiden say "Get Down" a LOT. Most of the time he says it as he climbs off play equipment (or the kitchen table). We get a big kick out of his most recent use. He will come up to us, raise his arms and shout "GET DOWN" to be picked up. We keep correcting him (Pick me up) but Get Down has stuck.

We have a frequent scenario of Aiden standing somewhere between the kitchen and living room, whining or saying something fast & garbled that I can't understand. So I'll pick him up and ask "What do you want?". Lately he's shaken things up by asking to be picked up (Get Down) and then - before I can ask him - will say "What do you want". If I DARE follow his question by repeating "What do you want?" then he'll throw a huge tantrum, as if it is SO OBVIOUS what he wants! Yesterday I realized he thinks the phrase "what do you want" means "let's stroll through the pantry and see what interests you". Probably because I frequently pick him up in the pantry so he can see what is in on the shelves and in the snack basket. Hence the tantrum - he believes he has clearly asked to be taken into the pantry and I'm stupidly echoing him for my own fun!

And probably the funniest: Aiden often follows his own wind breaking with "I fart", no matter where we are. This is, of course, in addition to the "I poop" bomb he's most likely to shout in the grocery store and other crowded public places. (Except his p's aren't clear so he says "I foof" which isn't nearly as clear as "I fart".) He seems to ignore all my atempts to teach him to say 'excuse me' but today followed "I fart" with "thank you". Seriously. BOYS.

And this one just makes me melt: This week he's been pulling a wedding photo of Brian and I gently off the shelf, quietly studying it and then whispering "Mama, dada" before placing it carefully back on the shelf. Today he held it and quietly sighed "Dada work" before he put the frame away. Aaaaawwww!


Alisha said...

And that is why kids are so worth it. Thanks for sharing your funny stories! Aiden is seriously a silly dude!

larshannon said...

Thank you for sharing the stories. I love them.